Who Cares Who Is Right?

I found two interesting quotes tonight.

I don’t see any place in the Bible where Jesus says to be right. And I see a lot in the Bible where He tells us to learn about love.

- Lord, Save Us From Your Followers movie

And the other is, 

If I speak God’s Word with power, revealing all his mysteries and making everything plain as day, and if I have faith that says to a mountain, “Jump,” and it jumps, but I don’t love, I’m nothing.

- Paul of Tarsus, 1 Corinthians 13:2 (Msg)

So often, ideas thrown around on the internet and discussed and prodded and poked and foisted upon people and packaged and presented and overmade and remade that a high emphasis is made of being "right." I'm less concerned today with being right than I am concerned with mirroring and becoming God's love to those around me.

Kylie, my 16 year-old just told me,

Being right inflates our pride, while love requires being humble. It's easier to focus on ideas. With writing, there is so much to learn about it. If you focus so much on the how, the rules, the technique, you can actually stop writing. What makes you a writer is writing. If we focus on theology all the time, there's little time to actually practice our Christian faith by putting the love we learn about into action.

Well said, baby girl.

I Forgot To Type the Title of the Post

Nearly everything I've written lately has not been posted here. It's partly because my blog here is stalled. I wanted a better set up, a smoother appearance, a better this, a nicer that, and in my ignorance, I let my domain expire rather than transfer it. A word of advice about custom domains: Never, ever let them expire. All the momentum I never realized I had gained here went away when that happened. I should have listened to that little voice in my head that said, "Wait!"

So. My momentum is no more. My "mo" is no mo'. Not exactly a shining achievement, but like my friends who lost nearly everything in the Waldo Canyon Fire, I have a chance to start fresh here. I have a few ideas that I'm starting to firm up. This blog will continue to publish as I go, making changes on the fly. Wherever I go, I'm going to do all I can to take you, my friends, along. I will be careful not to lose you again!

Why haven't I been publishing? Partly because my walk with God had hit a coasting spot. If you've walked with Him for any amount of time, you'll know what I mean by coasting. He's not really talking much, and I'm not in any hot water with any one. Nothing seems to be in crisis (aside from fire, flood, and famine, which we've seen before, to one extent or another). I just came to think that there wasn't really anything going on in my walk. Boy, was I wrong! Never ever (is there an echo in here?) believe the lie that God isn't working 24/7/365 on you!

Sure, there will be moments when there's peace around you and he's not visibly altering your heart by pressing it in a vice and heating it with fire, but that's where I got tripped up. I thought that since he wasn't coaching me and I kept talking to Him, that everything was fine and there were "no worries." It's the tagline from a Jaws sequel that haunts me: "Just when you thought it was safe to go back in the water..."

It's always that problem that hangs just beneath the surface. Worse yet, it was contributing to my lack of writing. It seems to me that nothing is worse than a constipated writer. Sorry for comparing this to such a base idea, but when a writer is not writing, it's not that he's stopped writing. It's that he's stopped listening with his heart and writing from what he hears. All the other stuff he's written is not from that spot and the works range from little bits from his heart to what could be considered busy work.

I had been up all night, struggling over the issue, when I had finally resolved to "fix" the problem with what appeared to be the only solution. That's when my wife, wonderful Karen, asked in a middle-of-the-night croaky voice, "Did ya pray about it?"

"What?!" I responded in anger. Whoa. Wait a minute. Did I just yell at my wife? Yep, I shamefully confess that I did, and I was clearly in the wrong. Sorry. The worst part of it is that I hadn't consulted the God Who knows better than me in every circumstance. Sorry, again, Poppa. So I did, and He showed that He's got a better solution than I have. He is faithful, providentially faithful, even when we are faithless. He has never failed me to give me what I need, even if it's not always what I want.

Your brother in the Lion of Judah,
Steve

PS: If you want to read a bit of good news that has come as a result of last Thursday night in Aurora, there is a story of God's grace that, with a little help from me, has gone viral. Petra (PAY-tra) is a graduated homeschooler who already has a gift that shines even as her mom struggles to extend her days here with her. Brave young lady! I'm praying for her and all the others affected by this tragedy.

Chasing the Changes, Changing the Pages

So. What has been happening at Walden's Wits? Not much, obviously. This blog is "in transition," to put it mildly. I deliberately let the domain WaldensWits.com lapse because I really didn't want to spend my family's already precious income on what is essentially a vanity. That might change, especially if finances pick up again in the fall like they usually do. While I understand that some folks may not be able to find my blog anymore, I don't know that many folks found the custom name terribly memorable. In the meantime, suggestions for new names on this blog can be e-mailed or commented. This being a personal blog, it's themes will change from time to time, but something on my name or my nicknames will surface eventually and we'll change the name.

My life tends to oscillate between learning and teaching. When I started this blog, I was a gainfully employed husband and father of a toddler and two children under 10. Now those children will all be over 10 in a year or so, and my disability has prevented my full-time employment for most of that time. My family has started a ministry, a business and a few other ventures. I'm having to learn what it means to parent teenagers, how to manage hormones that aren't my own, and to do so without stressing myself out and making my condition considerably worse.

I was a blogger advocating homeschooling as an education choice, which, because of it's own merits, is like advocating safer driving or Arbor Day. In doing so, I felt a little bit like a boy scout helping a linebacker cross the street. Much of the educational community seems to have decided that homeschoolers are going to fight any abrogation of their rights and figured they would be better off trying to "help" homeschoolers back into schools with programs rather than harass or intimidate them. Right now, there's just not that much controversy, not that I sought controversy, but it is what makes some blogs popular.

Instead, I found my best work encouraging others in their efforts to educate their kids at home. Homeschooling is going strong and my wife and I continue to educate our kids exclusively on our own, a freedom we appreciate immensely and continue to support wholeheartedly. But change happens. Our local homeschool group disbanded, and it's emphasis on mothers didn't exactly help fathers engage. Our larger homeschool agency suffered a coup d' état, falling to folks whose views run contrary to our own, leaving us unaffiliated with a conference and without that seasonal boost to get us re-focused.

Rather than focus on these issues, I've wanted to keep my tone positive. The problem came when I held myself back from saying things. It shuts me down and I haven't wanted to write about it. I guess that may keep me out of a fight, but if I want to write, it's not such a good idea.

So. This is truly in transition! I'm not someone to champion a person or cause because anyone short of Jesus Christ is going to have problems and imperfections. I'm so fiercely loyal, I get wrapped up in those issues and my imperfect character and intellect can end up hurting a lot more than myself, and that is difficult to shoulder. I want to help, not hurt, protect, not proselytize, confirm, not condemn. I will continue to aspire to the positive. But I can't keep silent on issues I see. If I'm wrong, I'm wrong, but I don't want to drag everyone in with me. I'll simply recognize the error--hopefully--and go on. In the meantime, I need to give myself permission to just say what's on my mind and not take so much in the way of self-censorship. I might even float the odd fiction piece or poem, even if there's plenty of bad fiction and even worse poetry already out there. I will either add to the dross or let my work be judged worthy of someone else's attention. In the meantime, stay tuned!

Walden's Wits Returns

Annnnd, I'm back!

If you have been trying to check this blog recently, you most likely got a 404 error or something similar. It's because a service I was using to bring you WW decided to take its servers down permanently. Oh well. It was free and I got what I paid for. Now I'm using a paid service and I'm happy.

I know I haven't been super prolific lately and I'm grateful for my readers (both of them). I'm okay with it, because I can only do what I can. I'm no longer interested in personal success, if I ever was. I just want to be faithful to God and who He's made me to be by loving Him and loving those around me as sincerely as I can.

God and Debt, Practice and Provision

One thing my wife and I have been trying to do the last eight months is pay down our credit cards and get out of consumer debt. It's one thing to use a credit card to maintain a standard of living that you can't truly afford anymore. It's quite another to be at an absolute minimum and still need things like food and heat after all the money is gone.

We were living on credit a long while before we neared our maximum and could not keep the vultures from circling. We went into foreclosure, nearly losing our house, until friends stepped forward and helped us cure our mortgage under Colorado law.

Since then, we have never been late on a mortgage payment, and hopefully we never will be again, although July looks a bit sketchy because of a downturn in our business. God knows, and he's already there at July with what we will need. I know it. I believe it. He's told us we "will not lose our house for financial reasons." He gave me a "fleece" that came true to the letter, and that's what we hung on to during the foreclosure. If I hadn't received the fleece, I would likely have listened to the folks around me and sold our home to a vulture.

God has stepped in like that from time to time, giving me what I needed to make a crucial decision. It's not my talent or abilities that saved us. It was His word to us and his children around us hearing his voice and obediently giving. Trusting His power and grace to meet us where we were was all we could do. We had no other option.


So where was I? Credit cards. God has allowed us to go into credit card debt. We've prayed and felt His leading was to do what was necessary to provide for us. That may fiddle with people's theology or their fiscal theosophy, but that's where we were. He has always told us in those times that He will deliver us from the debt. But that doesn't mean He will the next time we may run short. It's His provision, so it's His call.

Yet He's also given us enough the last eight months to not just stay out of adding to the debt, but to pay down the debt. But which cards to pay off first? Do we knock off the little ones regardless of the interest rate? Or should we pay down one of the larger ones first? If so, do we pick one with a low rate or a high rate? We don't get any particular direction, spiritually, so we set out to find the smartest way. The answer was a little surprising.

I want to do what brings God the most glory with every aspect of my life, despite--and often through--my frailties. It's not about me, or my finances, or my family's future, really. It's about Him being willing to meet us in our need  and acting to put us in a position that only his Son really deserves. He's powerful and wonderful and glorious in His work. We get what we don't deserve, and His providence is more than enough for what we need. Praise His name!


 

Grace

What I posted yesterday was missing something. Sin is sin. It never stops being what it is. Yet what I just told a friend is something I need to say here. I told her,

Remember too that your Daddy's view of things is the only view that matters. What some would count gain, He calls loss and what is by all other accounts a loss is great gain.

Living Pro-life, Living Proof

I am pro-life. I have been since age 6. I will be pro-life whenever I die, if I do. I am among the first children born in the era of the federalized SCOTUS pseudo-law, "Roe v. Wade."

That is ideology. I have very scientific and moral reasons for this belief. I also have a very scriptural foundation to believe that abortion and euthanasia are wrong and those who practice it, practice evil. It is what I believe to the core of my being. That is my ideology.

When it comes to walking that ideology out, it means my family and I raise funds for our local pregnancy ministry every Spring. We even show up to some meetings for donors. I write our representatives in congress. I even write our newspaper editor. We are pro-life.

But we've never been forced to make a decision like Craig and Jessica Council. Their story is intense, gut-wrenching and all-too-real.

They are pro-life, and like a doctor said, they lived every bit of it.

Living Pro-Life Living Proof graphic (c) Walden's Wits 2011

From Training A Child To Training A Young Man

We interrupt our regularly scheduled blogging for a very important letter from a father to his son. 

 Dear Son,

This letter is reaching you in April on your birthday, but I started it in January. Something this big is going to take planning and I need to get all the head start I can. I'll get to that in a moment.

You're 12 today. Yea! A solid dozen years of life is now under your belt, and that's terrific! Things haven't been easy for you all the time. You've stuck to your chores, and as you've gotten bigger and more capable, we've given you new ones. However, it's not just that you've grown more capable. You've grown more responsible as well. You don't shirk from doing the job you've been assigned.

You've learned the physical and demanding game of football, so much so that I respect your abilities and your talents. If you continue to practice, work hard, and stay true to your desire, you could certainly play high school in a few years, and from there, there's only One Who knows how far you can go.

Because of these changes and because you are my son, we're going to be training you in things that men are expected to be able to handle. I will teach you all I know about plumbing, household maintenance, car care, and more. I'll train you in driving. I will help you begin to think defensively and how to guard yourself and your loved ones to protect them as best you can.

I will be giving you scriptures to memorize so that you have His Word hidden in your heart. I know from experience that there will be times in your life where you are glad you committed the Scriptures to memory, times where having a Bible is too impractical but where you can bring up out of the storehouse of your heart the solid, insightful truth as you are led by the Holy Spirit. That is the true use of the Sword of the Spirit.

I will be praying with you, teaching you how to meditate, and how to cultivate an active prayer life. I've already worked with you on hearing the Spirit. My hope is that we can improve on this with time and patience.

We will consider all of this part of your homeschooling, but more importantly, I pray that in the end, you will consider this the most valuable part of your early education. I say early education because, really, you never stop learning. But if you start good, if you have a clean, stable foundation, whatever you place on top of it will be in good shape.

Son, I love you. I know you are getting older and I am racing to fill your mind and heart with what you need when you leave. I pray I give you everything God wants me to give you. If I do, I know I will have done as good a job as I can. In the end, I want to hear "Well done! You are good and faithful. Enter into your Father's happiness." As you grow, you will hunger for that more also.

As we move forward, my goal is not to create another "Steve," but to help you become the best you possible in God's sight. Remember that this may not be the same as the best you in the sight of the world. We need to keep talking about this as we go.

I love you, son. We are different in some ways and the same in others. In all, I find you a wonderful boy and future man. You bring me happiness and thankfulness. You are a blessing of God in my life, and I am thankful for you.

Love,

Dad

Thanksgiving Special

My family has enjoyed Focus on the Family Radio Theater for years. The Chronicles of Narnia and A Christmas Carol are often listened to, almost as much as the Adventures in Odyssey, also from Focus. Radio Theater engages your mind much more than TV or movies. Your mind creates the stage for the performers, and the drama is perhaps even more real as adventures and drama unfold.

So, I'm thrilled to tell you that today, Focua on the Family Radio Theater is offering the Thanksgiving story of Squanto for FREE! I really love this story! Visit CBD to complete the download. You will need to complete a CBD order (and obtain an account if you don't have one), and you will likely need to download and install a player from Akamai to play the content on Quicktime.

It's a neat way to bring the story of Thanksgiving home tomorrow!

A Celebration Of Life, Of Memories, and Of Love

Writing, it seems, makes thoughts stick.

My dad is 70, as of August. His own dad never made it to 70. Perhaps as a celebration of sorts, he is writing his memoirs. And he's doing so with the patient help of my mom. I'm very proud to know he's doing this and more than a little excited! His memories are parts of my own history, and more importantly, a legacy that I can pass on to my own children and their children's children. That is, if Jesus doesn't come back before then, which is one of my dad's favorite caveats. He's anxiously waiting for Him, and so am I.

Still, if He does delay, I will have the memories of my dad long after he passes on, in the earthly sense. I say "in the earthly sense," because my dad really won't die. Sure, his body may stop living, and I will be very sad to see him leave. But he's going somewhere special. ;-)

A friend lost her uncle, in the earthly sense of course, last week. She's sad and we talked for a while, but like Paul said, we don't mourn like those who have no hope. The more I think about death, the more I am convinced it doesn't exist for the Christian. Again, we see the body they leave behind, but it's uncanny how many times I have heard relatives, after they've viewed the body of their loved one, state that their loved one isn't there. Call it a "death mask," or whatever, but based on my own experiences, I can confirm that the body is a shell that we leave behind and that dying isn't the end.

So, if Jesus does not return before I die, I have my dad's writings to help me remember and hold onto the good. And if that isn't something worth celebrating, I don't know what is! Whether with a camera, a paintbrush, or a pen, it is a good thing to make memories stick. Death cannot claim them if we are sure to make them last.

Failing Into the Kingdom

Being a kid with unusual sensitivity and creativity was a sure-fire recipe for disaster back in the 1980s classroom. Combine that with a learning disability and even the nicest set of boys and girls can turn hostile. Coming around to Facebook and renewing friendships from that era has taught me that most people learn more grace and accommodation as they age. I'm relieved that old injuries heal with time, and most importantly, that God can heal the most stubborn wounds with time and prayer.

Yet, perhaps the worst enemy we face growing up and into our adult lives is our own flesh. Our natural desires to protect ourselves, become independent and control your environment were cultivated in that same 1980s classroom. Those desires can be a true liability when our lives get turned upside down. Can I truly protect my family? Can I control what happens to them, or to me? Can I maintain my independence when pain robs me of the ability to walk, stand or even wash my hair?

Yes, I can't wash my hair without causing my shoulders and back to flare up with arthritic inflammation. And Fibromyalgia just loooooves that inflammation! It was so hard to ask for help with that. In fact, when it came down to it last week, I couldn't. I actually found myself protesting, "No, let me do that. You don't have..." Then I found my heart asking, "Then who's going to do it? You?" And that's where I found myself, quietly crying while my wife washed my hair. It was a picture of God's grace that was itself almost too much to bear.

It's hard to ask for help. Yet God isn't calling me to protect myself, become independent and control my environment. In fact, it seems that the enemy of my soul is the one voicing those thoughts of protection, independence and control. If I were in that mindset, I would have been absolutely beside myself with our car situation today. With one dead and one fainting at the sight of a ignition key, it's called for prayer, grace, and trust. Sure enough, God comes through with a loaner vehicle, help from a stranger, and a part cheaper than we expected.

How can I impugn a holy and righteous God who never fails? It seems that in all things, He wants to grow us in prayer, grace and trust. even when we grew up thinking that such things were for the desperate. Maybe that's why God has to make us desperate in the first place. Maybe He wants to show us a life far better than we could make it.

Grumble, Grumble, Toil and Trouble

Let's see.

We have one vehicle, namely the van used to carry my wheelchair, down for repairs after it died just before entering the Eisenhower Tunnel (CDOT, Wikipedia). The hills approaching both ends of this tunnel have killed more vehicles than I care to count! Currently, our beloved van sits outside my house while we mull repair versus replacement. Repair is winning, but the price of $4,500.00 is just a bit outside our comfort zone. Anyone got a Chevy 350 small block in their pocket?

Joni Faces A New Test of Faith

This stings a bit. Joni, a woman God has used to be a voice for Christians living with disabilities, has been diagnosed with breast cancer. Please pray for her, her husband Ken Tada, and her ministry. Her video message is at Joni's Corner.

Haitian Orphans Come Home to Colorado

They're home! They're home! They're home!

Letters from the Field: Obamavilles And The Fruits Of Repentance

Dear Friends,

How are you? How was your Christmas? Mine was incredible! A family stepped forward and offered to help with our Christmas gifts this year, buying nearly everything we wanted and everything we needed. They are a family that dearly wants to hear God's voice in their lives and it excites me to see it.

Have you heard about Obamaville?

The name of the town reminds me of a classic Jimmy Buffet tune, a favorite of my cousin's. This is a real sign of America's Second Great Depression. Iconic pictures of the 1930s tent cities, in some cases called "Hoovervilles," dot the news. Like the early years of the last depression, economic measures designed to slow or even reverse the decline may not be all that helpful and in some cases may actually hurt the economy.

I am no expert, but having a blog means having a point of view. My great friend, Andrew, shares similar circumstances as my own, unable to work because of his physical condition. He told me on New Year's Eve what I had instinctively known and remembered from high school economics. The numerous bailouts the government has engaged in is against the fundamental rule of capitalism. If AIG, et. al, truly failed financially, the government should have let it fail and go into bankruptcy. That's the reason for bankruptcy courts. Procedures exist for failures like that, procedures that might have better served the American people. Instead, the executives are bailed out by the one entity that should have put them in court to defend their actions. This is corruption, plain and simple.

In times like these, it is not enough for us to simply pray that God help the needy and suffering. Nor is it enough to fast, to humble ourselves before God and expect Him to hear us. It requires a fundamental heart change. It requires individual and corporate repentance. It requires what God lays out in Isaiah 58.

Isaiah 58:1-8

(the Message paraphrase)

Tell my people what's wrong with their lives,
     face my family Jacob with their sins!
They're busy, busy, busy at worship,
      and love studying all about me.
To all appearances they're a nation of right-living people—
     law-abiding, God-honoring.
They ask me, 'What's the right thing to do?'
     and love having me on their side.
But they also complain,
     'Why do we fast and you don't look our way?
     Why do we humble ourselves and you don't even notice?'

"Well, here's why:
"The bottom line on your 'fast days' is profit.
You drive your employees much too hard.
You fast, but at the same time you bicker and fight.
You fast, but you swing a mean fist.
The kind of fasting you do
     won't get your prayers off the ground.
Do you think this is the kind of fast day I'm after:
     a day to show off humility?
To put on a pious long face
     and parade around solemnly in black?
Do you call that fasting,
     a fast day that I, God, would like?

"This is the kind of fast day I'm after:

• to break the chains of injustice,
• get rid of exploitation in the workplace,
• free the oppressed,
• cancel debts.

What I'm interested in seeing you do is:

• sharing your food with the hungry,
• inviting the homeless poor into your homes,
• putting clothes on the shivering ill-clad,
• being available to your own families.

Do this and the lights will turn on,
     and your lives will turn around at once.
Your righteousness will pave your way.
The God of glory will secure your passage.
Then when you pray, God will answer.
You'll call out for help and I'll say, 'Here I am.'

If you want to see a change you can believe in, if you want to see God answer prayers, don't just fast and hope that He blesses you. Don't just hunger after God. Model your heart and actions after Him! Engage those around you and work to ease their suffering. If you see injustice, work to end it! If you see your employees hard pressed, stop work until they catch their breath. God does not saddle you with a heavy burden, does he? He does not bicker and fight with you, does he? Can you honestly say you follow Him when you live in ignorance of His most fundamental motives? We may claim to love the Lord God with all our passion and prayer and intelligence and energy, but until we love others as well as we love ourselves, we cannot honestly claim the title Christian, literally "Christ follower."

This is heavy stuff, but God does not pull any punches when we've missed something this elementary. Christians in business cannot place profit above and beyond the humanity and charity God commands from us all. As Marley lamented in A Christmas Carol, "Business! Mankind [should have been] my businesss!" Indeed, Scrooge himself walked in repentance by placing a very human interest in his employee Bob Cratchit and his family. The complaints that socialism and fascism brought against capitalism were very similar to the complaints that the three spirits of Christmas brought to Scrooge, that men in capitalism only enrich themselves by exploiting the working poor. The very reason America was successful in the first place was that men lived by the morality of their faith, putting into practice the charity and kindness that their faith professed. Alexis DeToqueville, in Democracy in America, put it this way,

Despotism may govern without faith, but liberty cannot. How is it possible that society should escape destruction if the moral tie is not strengthened in proportion as the political tie is relaxed? And what can be done with a people who are their own masters if they are not submissive to the Deity?

If we profess freedom, and we do, then we must live by God's morality. Instead of seeking what we can get out of our employees, our "human resources," should we not treat them as good or better than ourselves? This change must start in our hearts, work into our minds, and out through our hands. Obamaville may be a ghost town in years to come, but only if we get the message.

A brother from a different mother,

Steve

Benched

I have not had too many "up" days recently. A lot have been spent laid out in bed, searching for some way to lay my body that didn't cause pain. I don't have an explanation. I can't readily point to something and say, "I overdid it and I shouldn't do that." It's just been one long string of ow. Ow, this hurts. Ow, that hurts. It wouldn't be so bad if the fatigue wasn't the super-industrial quality that gives me 30-120 minutes before it knocks me out again. It's just one more day in the life of Fibromyalgia. On the up-side, I found a good page that really spells out to folks what FM is like, thanks to Adrienne Dellwo of About.com.

The most frustrating part is knowing that I missed a day of my kids lives with nothing but a dented mattress to show for it. They only have 120 more before their birthdays (all in April), and they're changing every day. I feel like because I can't keep my head from the pillow, I'm failing them as a father. This isn't reality, of course. I have no choice in the matter. It's just the way my emotions get the better of me when I miss time with them. I can certainly relate to those who are imprisoned, those who can't beat their addictions, and those like me who struggle with a debilitating illness. You see life passing by and it hurts to know that you're not a part of it every day.

Yet, I have to believe that God will give me the ability to be there for my kids when it matters. I need God to give me the strength and stamina to be a father and pastor to my family. I need Him, period. He will supply all my needs. His grace is sufficient for me, for His power is made perfect in my weakness. He's given me everything I need for life and godliness. My hope will not disappoint, my faith is steadfast and firm, not because I am powerful, but because He is all-powerful in me, my weak and tattered body. He will deliver me from this body of death through Jesus Christ, our Lord! I cling to this, even in the darkest of times.

Take comfort in Him. He will meet your every need.

Dealing With An Angry Heart

As a father and a Christian, I have a unique opportunity to help my children tap into one of their greatest assets: their relationship with the Holy Spirit. Jesus said that He would send us the Holy Spirit who would guide us into all truth. The Spirit is a counselor, a companion and a direct link to God’s heart for us.

Tonight, my eldest was having one of her battles against her horrible tension headaches. She literally feels like the muscles are going to break her skull. After I assured her that wasn’t going to happen, I asked her if she had been talking to God about her worries. She said it seemed He wasn’t listening. When I dug deeper, it came to light that she didn’t want to say to God some things that she was feeling about Him.

One obstruction to a life free in Christ, living by His Spirit, is refusing to be honest with God about ourselves. We may feel like we aren’t worthy of His attentions. We may feel angry at, hurt by, or even abused by Him. Failing to bring these things front and center in our prayers with God is being dishonest with Him. We may feel like He doesn’t want to hear why we’re angry or that He will strike us down with an even worse affliction if we “complain.”  Beloved, if your heart cannot bear the wound, don’t you think your Creator wants to help, to heal you and comfort you? Doesn’t He already know your heart and what you feel? Refusing to bring these things out and deal with them in His presence is preposterous and ignorant of the One Who loves us.

God really wants us to be honest about our feelings with Him. He’s a big God, and he can take the vitriol and fire of an angry heart. The dissolution of pretense is the solution.  Being honestly angry with God is something we all need to be at some point. It’s a natural outflow of human hearts saved by Love while still living in a fallen world of sin.

When we’re honest and forthright with our anger and frustrations, God will do one of two things with your heart. He will either help you understand the nature of the problem and lead you in the direction that will be most in line with His will for you, or He will comfort you and cry with you, giving you the grace and solace that only God can give. They call it the peace that transcends understanding. It may not be what you want, but it is definitely what you need, and God’s heart always gives you what you need.

So if you’re driving down the same ugly road, your fuel is low, and the lights on your dash just couldn’t get any redder, pull over. He’ll be coming along and you can let Him help. There’s one condition. Only you can pop the hood and let Him look you over. There’s no anger or condemnation in His eyes. You’re His child and you always will be. But you need to let Him be the one to guide you out of the bad part of town you’re in and learn how to let Him maintain your heart. He’s an excellent mechanic, and I trust him with my life, and more importantly, my children.

Never Abandoned In The Floodlands

In a former life that I now dimly remember, I occasionally got free music as a sales associate for The Ark Bookstore in Denver. Normally, the samples were of new, relatively unknown groups that their label was trying to push. There was the rare exception, however, and those were moments that made the low wages and long hours almost worth it. Chief among those moments was when our Sparrow representative stopped by with a pre-release copy of Steve Taylor's 1993 album, Squint. It was the last—so far—studio album that Taylor would release, capping a decade-long career in the Christian music industry. Most folks don't know who Steve Taylor is. However, most Christians have likely heard the Newsboys' song, Shine, which Steve produced and wrote the lyrics to. In fact, Steve's partnership with the Newsboys is what most credit them for their success.

Steve's music has had a huge impact on my life. Songs like Hero, Meltdown, On The Fritz and so many others fed my spirit when I faced religious hypocrisy and pretentious spirituality at a young age where I needed truth and solidarity. Truth confronts, but it also comforts. One of the best examples is in the song, "Curses," where the chorus (echoing Psalm 37:25) repeats,

Never have I seen the righteous forsaken
Never abandoned in the floodlands
Never have I seen their children out begging
Never have I seen them slip through your hands

This simple refrain would echo in my mind every time I faced worries about making mortgage or buying groceries. It remains a reminder that not only is God faithful, but that I am not the first of his children to encounter financial difficulty.

There is something else about the chorus. In this modern,"lower-middle class" lifestyle, I tend to forget the meaning of floodlands. Today, modern civilization has flood control. Rivers that used to rage and ravage towns and cities are now harnessed and regulated by dams and reservoirs. The floodlands were areas that were normally dry but prone to extensive inundation. As a result, no one who could afford to build would build in such an area. They tended to be vast areas with thick undergrowth crisscrossed by a myriad of foot trails. The only inhabitants were the poorest of the poor, vagrants living a nomadic lifestyle and eating hand-to-mouth. If a river were to flood, they would be among the first victims, sometimes the only victims. Being abandoned in the floodlands would never be by choice. It would be the last stop before dying.

God is always mindful of our situation. He never lets us slip through His hands. We make mistakes, but He never does. Also, notice what it doesn't say. It doesn't say that we would never see the floodlands, or walk through them. He may have us pass through the floodlands for any number of reasons, not the least of which would be to reach out to those are also in desperate need. Yet here is the one thing that brings me such comfort: we will never be abandoned! We have a God who carries us through the fiercest storms and the highest waves. Most importantly, when it's all over, we get to go home with Him. That's worth any trek we might face here on earth.

Just in case one thinks I'm blowing smoke, I'll offer a subjective proof, one of many small miracles God has done for me and my family. Two weeks ago, my mind turned to Christmas. It dawned on me that we might not make mortgage, let alone have the ability to purchase gifts this year for my children. Rather than fret, I told God about it and asked Him to please provide Christmas gifts for my kids. Later that week, I got a call from our church saying that a family wanted to bless a family in need with Christmas presents and asked if I would be interested. "Are you kidding? I was just praying about that this week!" I told them. Needless to say, everyone was blessed at how God worked the whole thing. He usually isn't so blatant and obvious. God uses subtle and practical ways for us most of the time. But once in awhile he offers us unmistakable signs that He's there. With God, we are never abandoned.

There Goes the Sesame Street Neighborhood

My wife came up and told me that Sesame Street had done another spoof. This time it was a skit called "Desperate Horse-wives." I got a groan when I asked if the characters were less than neigh-borly.

In all seriousness, I'm not that thrilled with how the folks at Sesame Street parody network TV shows. While I am sure that the creators mean simple and innocent fun with their skits, I believe it also sends the message that the shows they represent are normal and acceptable in normal households. I'm not sure how normal we are, but Desperate Housewives is a show that we do not let in our house. My children know that when Extreme Makeover Home Edition is over and they hear, "Previously on Desperate Housewives..." power to the television is to be immediately terminated. It's almost comical how they scramble to turn it off, as if they were diving on a live grenade.

While it may not be a grenade, many TV shows are painfully difficult for us to watch these days. Some of the shows are so corrosive, I wonder how anyone can possibly watch them. Consequently, some nights we simply don't turn on the television set. Instead, we will read a good book or play a game together, if we don't split up to do separate things. We avoid the shows not because we like feeling superior or cerebral, but because we've found that these shows actively interfere with our hearts and minds.  

^8-9Summing it all up, friends, I'd say you'll do best by filling your minds and meditating on things true, noble, reputable, authentic, compelling, gracious—the best, not the worst; the beautiful, not the ugly; things to praise, not things to curse. Put into practice what you learned from me, what you heard and saw and realized. Do that, and God, who makes everything work together, will work you into his most excellent harmonies. (Philippians 4:8, The Message)

I can't come out with a list of TV shows that I think are bad or good. The verse above should be more than enough for the average Christian, especially when it's paired with the conviction of the Holy Spirit. Each person is responsible only to God for decisions like these. However, Jesus did give us a special charge with children.

"And if anyone causes one of these little ones who believe in me to sin, it would be better for him to be thrown into the sea with a large millstone tied around his neck. Mark 9:42 (NIV)

To me this verse means that God takes the destruction of children's innocence very seriously. This is why the Sesame Street skits irritate me. It feels like they're playing with fire. Look smart all you want, but I would prefer if they would just stick with "C is for cookie," and the yip-yip monsters.

What? You've never heard of the yip-yip monsters?

Yip Yip

| MySpace Video Thanks Jodi!

Burning Questions

A friend of mine asked me what I thought of this. I thought, I hope they don't try to cook the chicken over all the glue, cardboard, simulated leather, and the myriad of chemicals likely to be in the books they're collecting.

Seriously, these folks have lost the point. If it were simply a matter of their faith being unable to accept anything but the KJV Bible, I wouldn't say anything because that's their issue that they need to work out with God. Something else is the matter.

They can burn all the books in the world except for their precious KJV and still never come to this critical realization: The problem is not in the books out there in the world; the problem is in our hearts. It's easier to burn someone's books than it is to examine our own thoughts and actions. It is true that they burned books and paraphernalia back in Biblical times, specifically Acts 19. Nonetheless, it was an outward demonstration of what had already happened in their hearts. Specifically, it was to make a clean break with the past lives they'd lived, burning the bridge behind them that lead back to the old ways. They knew that, if things got rough, their hearts might lead them back into the sorcery and divination they had been practicing. They could have sold all of their junk and received the equivalent of $35,000. That money went up in smoke because they didn't want to pass on the practices that they had abandoned.

This church's book burning is a case where the practice out-lives the meaning. It serves no real purpose, except to state their reading preferences and belief in the King James-only doctrine. Given that that statement could be made any number of ways, having a book burning is a foolish choice. It gives the appearance that small-town, North Carolina residents are intellectually backward. It plays to the stereotype that small-town southerners are narrow-minded, hyper-religious zealots. It invites comparison to the Nazis and other evil regimes, both real and imagined, that used book burning in their quest for an ideological purity. It is, in my mind, the worst thing they could possibly do to demonstrate their faith. This is exactly what the enemy would want them to do.

So what are we to do for people who operate like this? Should we correct them? Should we disown them? Neither; in fact we should pray for them, that the Holy Spirit would correct them, that he would stop them from continuing this practice. I pray that they come to a better understanding of God's love, and, in turn, move to a better expression of his love for others.