The Trouble With "Shoulds"

My wife and I have been going over the "Shoulds" in life. They sound like, "I should be better," "This should be getting easier," "What should I do?" or "We shouldn't be going through this." They're all expectations, and most of them belong in the dumpster. Shoulds tend to get complicated. We start out wanting to serve God, but we end up serving ourselves or something else entirely.

I'm not saying that "should" shouldn't be part of our vocabulary. I just believe it's a warning flag. Expectations are dangerous things. If we go around trying to meet every single one in our lives, we'll soon run ourselves ragged. It's not fair to the person God has made us to be. When we die, He's the only Judge we will have to give an answer to. In my own experiences, I've found that He doesn't think like we do. While I have some idea of what He wants through His word, it's not within my power to meet them. I can't make myself holy out of my own goodness, if we can even call it that. I can't force the fruit of the Spirit to manifest in my life. I can't manifest God's kingdom on my own. These things depend on God. All he asks for is a participant who willing to believe and act on His promises.

One thing I don't get. We become Christians by accepting God at His promise to rescue us from our just punishment that comes after we die. Yet, we balk at the idea of His meeting our needs while we're here. The God who rescues us in the afterlife is the same one who promises to clothe and feed us in this life, yet it's harder for us to accept the latter of the two. We swallow camels in one bite and strain to choke down a tiny gnat. We accept the gift of eternity and struggle to let Him have tomorrow.

I guess there are a few "shoulds" that still apply. I should love and trust God with all my tomorrows, starting today. I should be willing to let Him guide my steps as I walk beside him. I should drop my expectations of what should happen and let these light and momentary afflictions pass without protest. I should let Him have control, starting with my "shoulds."